The cold has seeped in already. I’m back to that time of the year where I’m stingy with my heat just to save some money, and I wear lots of clothes around the house so I don’t freeze. Do you ever get comfortable enough where you don’t have to live like this anymore? I dream of a warm house with a roaring fireplace, and mugs of hot coffee. Although, my heat bill would still be far less if I had a fireplace.
I digress. Needless to say I’ve had to skip around in my Soup Bible, looking for ones that are going to warm my bones. Last night I made a roasted pepper soup, and a spicy Mexican chili. The chili is fantastic. It was exactly what I needed on a night like tonight. I curled up with my blanket, some toasty bread and my warm bowl of soup. It was a scene made for fall.
Picture perfect as it might be, it is only a small moment in time. Things have gone back to being crazy, and with it, my sanity. I feel so tired all of the time. I get a good day or two of serious productivity and then I just can’t go anymore. With the job I have, that’s not really an option. How do I keep myself together all of the time? How do I make everything work?
Is this a feeling that men experience? The need to have it all going for them? I feel like as a woman I’ve got this pressure to be perfect. I need to have the circle of close friends, the great job, the loving and supportive boyfriend, a great closet, good hair days all the time, the perfect balance between work and my social life, domestic skills, and (lets not forget) I’m hetting up there in my “prime” years–shouldn’t a family be coming soon? Marriage? How are we supposed to do it all? I don’t even have one answer for those questions.
I know this, though. Tonight I am taking off from everything. I’m eating my soup, curling up on the couch, and reading a book. Tomorrow I’ll start on some of those answers. But tonight, it’s me and a bowl of Mexican chili to warm my heart.